I can exclusively reveal that Boyd’s Own Paper has been the subject of possible Russian interference. When I started BOP I specifically asked Ivan Tokutchyakokov, whilst I interviewed him for the post of BOP cybersecurity, if he was Russian and he said Da. I did not employ him as I later discovered he had been dismissed from his last position for rifling the drawers of the girls in the typing pool. The NKVD’s evil machinations have been stymied as far as BOP is concerned, but patently one should be deeply suspicious about the result of the last General Election which seems to have bought a hard-line socialist into the very bosom of the nation. I shall be revealing my sources when appropriate!
Last night, a moment of social respite from the bloody back and shoulder niggles of autumn mizzles, and the far more painful and growing effronteries of modern British life. An early evening of munchies and theatre with jolly people, what could be better to cheer. So off to the Barn Theatre in Cirencester, to see The King’s Speech, via a local Arkell’s pub, The Admiral Sir John Talbot, which has been totally revamped and resurrected in the last four months. They have stolen the chef from the Polo Club and he is settling in. It was a jolly party hosted by the production team at the Anthology Theatre company. Among the guests, was someone I have only met briefly before, who went straight into my Book of Very Good Eggs, if only because she and I agreed that Ascot had moved beyond the pale in its vulgarity, and Cheltenham is now unhappily over-commercialised, and in danger of no longer being fun.
Then a five-minute stroll for the polo players (longer for others), and in to the play. Having seen the film and its lavish production values, I was concerned at how the story would unfold in terms of “Royal Standards.” I need not have worried. The staging was a triumph and as a result, it’s sheer simplicity, made the unfolding story of an unlikely friendship, all the more poignant. The appalling upbringing of the Kings Edward VIII and George VI had damaged them both; the former devoting his life to running away from his duties and embracing every sort of situation that would end his unhappiness, and his brother’s total devotion to his perceived duty at whatever cost and despite his dreadful self-doubt and very public speech afflictions. A well-known story, but beautifully portrayed, not least by the Aussie actor (inevitably Neighbours of long-standing), Stefan Dennis playing Lionel Logue. I am no critic, so I’m not going to go through every nuance, and performance and rate them. It was well done, it was moving, it had pathos. I sat in my seat, having accepted the unspoken contract that what I am seeing is an illusion, full of lines, compressed in time, and surrounded by fake doors and chairs that come and go. I set aside all that logic and was totally emotionally invested. It was better than Good, it was Excellent and is going on tour. Go.
As a footnote, the Barn Theatre has also had the Million Dollar Quartet (brilliant) and Yes Prime Minister (Funny and au courant), both on tour, or already in London.
Over the next days, the cacophony of fake stats and earnest tosh rolled out by the Massed Collecting Tins of The Healey Budget Band will be heard relentlessly progressing from studio to studio trying to calm the markets. There will however only be the most superficial benefit cuts, probably linked to heaping the tick box exercises onto others, such as GPs; ISA’s will take a spanking; IHT properties will be linked to the cost of the original property even if you have spent a million on it and bought two hundred acres of your neighbour’s land; and online marketplaces will be made responsible for collecting the tax due on goods sold.
One simple tax-saving method would be to introduce a moratorium on anyone under 30 on benefits and unable to provide payslips for the last six months showing regular tax payments, taking out new car loans, purchasing full Sky TV subscription packages, or being able to purchase cigarettes.
Watching The Greens playing politics makes the Traitors look like the Teddy Bears picnic. Deputy Leader Nothing Normali said he will not support any amendment to the Zionist Racist motion because it might make “our member-led democracy” look a bit iffy. The second Deputy Leader Rachel Brokensword, said: “To those members who feel disorientated by this deluge of divisive headlines… I see you.” Phew, and for a moment, there Zak I thought you were in trouble. Apart from the fact that you have totally buggered up Burnham’s election plans for a coalition in the event of a hung parliament. What’s worse the second fall-back is now wobbly because the Lib Dems don’t know the name of their future leader, who will only be selected on the grounds that she doesn’t own a wetsuit, Life is just peachy in Parliament.
I don’t often wail, but I happened to see a press release from the Dreaming Guru formerly known as Charlotte Church, who set up The Dreaming at Rhydoldog House near Rhayader, Powys, Wales (the former home of Laura Ashley), in some 47 acres of ancient woodland. I add nothing and say nothing to this marvellous piece of creative writing!
Dear Dreamers,
After five years of unfaltering practice, tending with diligence to the dreams of the land and our guests, we announce with hearts-a-brim that The Dreaming will be pausing its work at Rhydoldog from December 2026.
Through the harvest season, it is important to discern what requires attention from that which is falling away, what needs to be put to compost. We need the chance to compost, mulch, go fallow, listen deeply to the earth, so that we can germinate new dreams for the future. After all, we would be nowhere had we not first had a dream that was given time to sprout and blossom.
Over the last five years, over three thousand people have been welcomed as guests on our retreats. For many, it was their first step towards a life more aligned with, and with greater awareness of, nature and spirit. Hundreds came as part of our “pay-what-you-can” scheme, offering as little as £1 per night. Our free-to-attend retreats for NHS workers and activists respectively remain amongst our proudest achievements, along with pioneering retreats for Muslim women, melanated women of African and Caribbean descent, and the queer community.
And then there are the hundreds of amazing people who have joined us as part of our work-exchange and artist-in-residence programmes, each of whom, in offering their own gorgeousness to the land, found themselves in receipt of deep teachings that the valley had for them, and them alone. This collaboration: these glorious humans living in reciprocity, will forever be the beating heart of the story that has been The Dreaming.
The gifts have been unexpected, exquisite, life-changing, and too numerous to even begin listing. But it is a different world today than the one we started off in just a short half decade ago. As we stare clear-eyed at the exponentially complexifying crises that have been spreading out ahead of us all like cracking ice, we at The Dreaming need to reassess, with candour and courage what it is we should be offering to be in service.
And so we must dream. And to do so we must hibernate. We cannot say when exactly we will be returning from the dream realm, but return we shall. In the meanwhile, there are a few spaces left for our last Signature, Samhain, and Witch retreats, so book now to avoid disappointment. If you want to keep updated with new developments then please sign up to our newsletter, and you can always subscribe to our online course – a perfect companion for the darker months ahead.
If you feel like you would like to feed your own ideas into our dreaming we would love to hear from you. Please get in touch us directly. Finally, deep and loving thank you to all those who have supported us over the years, each one of you who has stepped through our faerie door and poured your own dreams into the cauldron. It has been a great honour to conspire with you in magic and mystery.
Until we dance again
The Dreaming x
There is so much in there that should appear in The Healey Budget.
Madame Deputy Speaker: The Chancellor of The Exchequer
The Chancellor The Exchequer: (for it is he). As we stare clear-eyed at the exponentially complexifying crises that have been spreading out ahead of us all like cracking ice, we on this side of The House, will need to reassess, with candour and courage what it is we should be saying to this country as regards our finances. We need the chance to compost, mulch, go fallow, listen deeply to the earth so that we can germinate new dreams for the future. To do so we must hibernate. We cannot say when exactly we will be returning from the dream realm, but return we shall. And whilst we sleep I shall set CGT at 35%, change the taxation system of all second houses and introduce a maximum holding in any ISA of £100,000 after which CGT will apply.